News at Home: Accepting my new normal
This week has really been about me accepting my new normal. I think I had an idea of how life-altering a child can be, but there is no preparing for it. Especially since there is no way of knowing what your child will be like and need. I think the biggest thing for me has just been learning to accept and gradually embrace my new way of life. Part of that is finding ways to make it still fit me and a lot of it is focusing on the joys of motherhood – and there are many.
A big part of making this new life fit me has been finding ways to get out of the house and interact with others. I NEED that. Sunday I went and did my nails in the morning and then we went to my brother’s for dinner and that was truly wonderful. The interaction, getting out of the house, and just feeling a bit like me. Plus, both Philip and his boyfriend held Dante for a bit, which was nice to see. Monday I spent some time on the phone with a friend and learned about a possible job opportunity that, if it works out, could radically improve things for my family. Unfortunately around 7pm Dante started fussing and we could not get him to stop. It was off and on all night. So I hit rock bottom Tuesday – I was a crying mess (and I’m not just talking about Dante) – and I spent the whole day just trying to figure out how to help him. Well, it seemed to pay off, as Dante has done a lot better the rest of the week. Yay!
Wednesday Dante turned 3 weeks old! We spent the day taking a couple walks and chatting with the apartment office staff (the manager is Kiko’s ex and a good friend). I’m starting to stop by the office 2 times a day now and getting that interaction is really helping me out. Thursday, Franky my step-son (19 years old) came over and spent the morning with us. He held Dante, fed him and came with us on a walk. We had lunch with the office staff – they were having a special lunch. It made for a really nice day. Friday I had my first treatment with my health coach – she’s like a reiki of sorts – and she did a treatment on Dante as well. Then I had my first real outing with Dante – I went out to lunch with the apartmen office ladies. It was just around the corner and only an hour, but it was FANTASTIC!!
And Kiko actually has off this weekend, so it’s been a good weekend, sharing Dante responsibility all day instead of being on my own. I went and got a wax, which is a not the most relaxing self-care choice, but it makes me feel like me, so it was nice. Plus, it meant I got out of the house without having to worry about Dante at all for about an hour. And I’m so tired, I actually did start to drift asleep on the wax table.
So I’m finding ways to get out and socialize. I’m also learning to accept that Dante will cry and that does not mean I’m failing as a mom, even when I can’t make it stop. Sometimes babies just cry and I have to accept it. This is hard for a perfectionist, but I’m getting there. I also am learning that for every tear I have the time cuddling him, with him looking up into my eyes with his amazing, wondering expression, and it’s fairly great. By refocusing on the positives I’m doing a lot better and enjoying my days a lot more.
Blog News
I’m still back, so that’s a huge plus! I’m managing to write a post OR visit blogs every day, sometimes both. It feels great to be back and I hope I can keep it up long term.
We also have our Can You Read a Series in A Month? Challenge, coming in November. It’s one of my favorite challenges, I hope you can join us 🙂
Last Week on the Blog
- [7 Oct] I’m ready to binge read… Can you read a series in a month? #signup
- [7 Oct] Can you read a series in a month? Challenge. Michelle’s Series Pick #seriesinamonth
- [8 Oct] Task It Tuesday! ~ Organized and Blogging Check #Taskittues #joinme
- [9 Oct] Just a Few Pregnancy Books I Read
- [9 Oct] 50 Things to Do Before You Deliver: The First Time Moms Pregnancy Guide by Jill Krause, Sara A. Robert MD ★★★
- [9 Oct] The Girlfriends' Guide to Pregnancy by Vicki Iovine ★★★½
- [9 Oct] Pregnancy, Childbirth, And The Newborn (2016-5Th Edition) by Penny Simkin, Janet Whalley, Ann Keppler, Janelle Durham, April Bolding ★★★★
- [10 Oct] #FraterfestRAT Witch One Mini Challenge Giveaway
- [11 Oct] #FitReaders ~ Update October 1 – 5
- [12 Oct] #MyTBRL ~ October 2019 Winner
- [13 Oct] Sunday Post with Berls | Accepting my new normal
- [13 Oct] The Sunday Post ~ Slow down October!!! ~ Week in READview!
Coming Next Week From Me
Sunday
Sunday Post with Berls
Tuesday
Wrong Number, Right Guy #audioreview
Thursday
Read Me Romance | She’s the One
Friday
Fit Readers Update | October 6-12
There’s so much going on all the time I think we all struggle a bit. I just want to sleep more, read more, but there’s too much to do I’m glad you are finding things which help. Don’t be afraid to talk to us and to friends there. Each week will get better and easier. It’s such an exciting time with Dante changing and growing.
You’re right, each week really is getting easier. I had a really rough morning Tuesday but otherwise this week has been good. and I think Tuesday was rough because i was getting re-used to being by myself after 3 days with my husband home.
Hope you’re having a good week 🙂
I don’t know if I”m coming or going lately. My son turned 16 last week, which was a bit emotional. I’m dealing with some stuff, but it will all be good.
It’s crazy how fast they grow up, isn’t it? My step-son is 19, so I know how emotional those big milestone ages can be! Hang in there, as you said, it will all be good 🙂
I remember how hard it was when myson would cry like that. I had a few good cries myself. I’m glad you are getting out some and things are calmer:)
I feel like there is no mom who hasn’t been driven to tears by their babies unrelenting cries… at least from talking to people that seems to be the case. I feel like we’re figuring things out so that’s a plus. I can’t believe he’ll be a month old this week! It’s going so fast.
Have a great week 🙂
Finding that new normal is so great and learning what YOU need is a lifesaver. The crying thing takes some getting used to but you’re definitely right . Hope you have a wonderful week!
Thanks Katherine. I do think figuring out how to meet my needs has been the most important piece. This week is going well so far, thanks! I hope you have a great week too!
That’s great that you’re recognizing what you need and taking steps to make it happen. Good for you! And sometimes a good cry is super cleansing. I hope this week is even better!
Yes, I do think letting it out really helped. A good cry is very cleansing. Thanks, I hope so too 🙂 Have a great week!
I’m so happy for you Berls! I’m bouncing in my chair,but it’s probably not good for it (it’s making ominous creaking noises) so I’ll stop. New normals seem to be the thing this year. We’re just getting into ours after hubby lost his job in August. No boring moments for us, right? Give Dante hugs and smooches from Auntie C and I’m going to rev up the {{{posivibes}}} for smooth sailing for you all. XOXO
PS: I got derailed on the book thing, but with things finally settling down here and I’ve done a preemptive strike by ordering a book cover from Michelle, I think I can finally get off my ass and write. Well, actually, I have to sit on my ass to write, but you get what mean. 😉
Yay! I’m so excited to hear that you’ve ordered a cover from Michelle – that’s definitely forward momentum. Yay!!! I’d dance, but Dante is asleep on me right now, so I’m dancing in my head 😉
Thanks Carol – yeah, new normals, even when they are positive changes , are a lot to adjust to. I appreciate the posivibes, we can use it as we work through these first few weeks. When does it get easy? Dante will be soaking up all the hugs as soon as he wakes up. {{HUGS}} Have a good week!
Sometimes we all need a good cry-adults and babies!! Glad you were able to get some time out of the house this week!
So true, a cry can be very cleansing 🙂 Thanks Samantha it’s been good to get out! Have a good week 🙂